OMG PD: Illegal Maneuver, Elevator Toilet Humor, Multi-Purpose Abs and A Disturbance Made From Scratch
We compile the "oh my god" worthy stories from around the region.
'I'm out of here,' fails to prevent pot pinch
When your car's escorted to the roadside by a couple of officers questioning your sobriety, telling them, "I'm out of here," then burning rubber and heading home doesn't make the problem go away. But one Woonsocket man choose that inadvisable maneuver during a March 11 traffic stop, neglecting to consider the officers' determination to continue the conversation later at his home, according to reports.
Police arrived at the driver's house after retrieving a few bags of marijuana they suspected he left behind while fleeing. After a brief struggle, they arrested the man, mentioning they'd found his marijuana. The man replied, "That's for my personal use," according to a police report. He was charged with felony possession of 22 grams of marijuana (22 days before that amount would've been decriminalized), obstructing an officer in the course of his duty, and driving in possession of a controled substance.
Toilet humor... without the toilet
Ever laughed so hard you peed…in an elevator? One Massachusetts woman can now add that to her list of life accomplishments following her arrest in East Providence last week. Police arrived at a hotel after receiving a call about a disturbance, finding the 22-year-old woman and her 21-year-old friend at the scene. Employees told police that the 22-year-old woman had urinated in the hotel’s elevator. When asked what prompted her to do number one in the elevator, the woman allegedly told police that her friend had “told her a funny joke that made her urinate onto the floor.” Both women were arrested on charges of disorderly conduct.
Red Bull Bandit's beer belly pulls double duty
When you can hide drug paraphernalia in your gut without swallowing them, it’s probably time to hit the gym. According to reports, a man wanted on multiple counts of shoplifting cans of Red Bull from several RI communities was caught by Middletown police following a traffic stop. Police arrested the man and brought him to the police station.
Officers became suspicious when a wallet fell out from the man’s stomach area. After lifting his shirt, police found a large section of fatty skin was folded over his stomach. Underneath said fold, police allegedly discovered a used syringe and a spoon with residue that later tested positive for cocaine.
Sometimes the customer is wrong — and itchy.
Usually when the North Kingstown Police Department responds to Kohl’s, it’s for a case of shoplifting. This past week, however, the problem was something a man already had on his person, when an employee allegedly saw a customer masturbating in the men’s department.
Police brought the man, who is from China, into the store’s back office and learned he did not speak English. When officers began to explain the situation to the man, he allegedly fell to his knees sobbing and began to beg for forgiveness – and then started slapping himself across the face.
Unable to communicate with the man due to the language barrier, police called a local Chinese restaurant in hopes of finding a translator. Luckily, an employee at the restaurant was able to help officers bridge the gap. According to the translator, the man did admit to exposing himself in the store, but denied masturbating. Apparently, the man said he was suffering from “extreme itchiness” and needed to scratch himself. Kohl’s chose not to press charges against the man, but police did issue a no-trespass order.